Fun with English (American & British)

ThePubThe other night dad and I visited “The Pub” for dinner, which got me thinking about British English vs. American English (sans the different dialects.)  As a side note, it would really be awesome if all the servers at The Pub actually spoke the Queen’s English, sadly they don’t.

I work for a company owned by Bryan,* a mate from England (exact location unknown although he’s told me several times.)  When I first begin working at the company, Bryan was on the road a lot and would call the office to have me do something, call someone, or retrieve his messages.  Each time the telephone rang, I would silently say a prayer that it wasn’t Bryan because of his heavy accent it was difficult for me to understanding what he was saying and I would often ask him to repeat himself, each time making me feel more like a dunce.

To say the least, with many years passed, I now completely understand Bryan (accent and terminology), like we both speak the same “English.”  No, I’ve not picked up any pronunciations of the British English, nor he with the American side of things.

I ran across the image below which, from my personal experience, is fairly accurate.

what-british-english-people-say-vs-what-they-really-mean

The original creator/author of this image could not be identified and therefore proper credit cannot be given. This image was not created by myself or anyone associated with http://www.lifesadventures.me.

English vs English

For fun I’ve listed some of the American words we all know and its British counterpart.

AmericanFlagAmerican BritishFlag on Britain Map
absentee ballot postal vote
advice columnist agony aunt
apartment flat
apartment building block of flats
bachelorette party hen night
backsplash splashback
barrette hairslide
checking account current account
coffee with cream white coffee
common stock ordinary share
counterclockwise anticlockwise
diaper nappy
divided highway dual carriageway
doghouse kennel
drop cloth dust sheet
drugstore chemist
emergency room casualty
fanny pack bumbag
fish stick fish finger
French fries chips
garbage can dustbin
grab bag lucky dip
guardrail crash barrier
hazard pay danger money
hood bonnet (of a car)
instant replay action replay
John Q. Public Joe Public
ladybug ladybird
lawn bowling bowls
layer cake sandwich cake
liquor cabinet drinks cupboard
mailbox postbox
median strip central reservation
mineral spirits white spirit
odometer milometer
pacifier dummy (for a baby)
pantyhose tights
parking lot car park
paved road metalled road
Popsicle (trademark) ice lolly
robe; bathrobe dressing gown
rummage sale jumble sale
rump roast silverside
scalper ticket tout
shopping cart shopping trolley
sidewalk footway
slowpoke slowcoach
sneakers trainers
sponge bath blanket bath
sprinkles (for ice cream) hundreds and thousands
station wagon estate car
suspenders braces
sweater jumper
switchblade flick knife
takeout; to go takeaway (food)
taxi stand taxi rank
thermos bottle vacuum flask
thumbtack drawing pin
tic-tac-toe noughts and crosses
tow truck breakdown van
tractor-trailer articulated lorry
trunk boot (of a car)
unlisted ex-directory
utility knife Stanley knife
vacation holiday
wall-to-wall carpeting fitted carpet
washcloth flannel
wholewheat bread wholemeal bread
yard; lawn garden
zip code postcode
zipper zip

*Name has been changed.

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Filed under Entertainment, Life, Miscellaneous, Work, Writing

Eighteen Years Ago Today

Eighteen years ago today at 6:38 pm, a special bundle of joy entered my life.  Over the years he has brought me immense amounts of joy and laughter; has shared his thoughts, kisses, snuggle time, tears, scrapes, and heartache.  The Boy has grown into a respectful man and has made his “Madre,” as he now calls me, very proud as I reflect and think “yeah, I did a pretty amazing job raising this young one on my own.”

Looking at the pictures through the years his physical appearance has changed dramatically; yet his soul has remained compassionate and full of love.  He is a man of character, has a humanitarian heart, is humble, respectful, and honorable.

Son, your life is an open book, waiting for you to fill the pages with adventure, love, laughter, family, and friends. Dream big and never be afraid to follow your dreams; you’ll be wonderfully surprised where they can lead you.

The world is your oyster.  Happy Birthday son; I am honored to be your mom and I love you to the moon and back a billion times!

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Filed under Aging, Celebration, Family, History, Life, Relationships, The Boy

A Mother and Her Sons

The Male Gender is Heavily Weighted In Our Family

I was a baby boy making machine in my younger years and gave birth to three absolutely amazing sons. I am already a Nona to three grandchildren, two of whom are male and we are expecting Master Xander in August, which will make me a Nona to four, three of them grandsons.

You know you’re a mom of boys when:

  • You find yourself willingly holding a living wiggling worm, bug, frog, or lizard and not running around screaming like a little girl.
  • You cannot remember what you ate for breakfast, yet you can inherently transform a Transformer without instructions.
  • You spend much of your days in a fog of fart odor and some of it is proudly yours.
  • You know the pain of stepping on a Lego, Tonka Truck, or Transformer.
  • There’s a finger in your eye, your ear, or up your nose and it’s not yours.
  • You find yourself telling the boys “No, you cannot ride the dog.”
  • You make it an annual family outing to go see the Monster Trucks with the special Meet and Greet passes.
  • You are on a first name basis with your doctors and the nurses at the hospital who provide the slings, splints, and casts.
  • You cannot find a pair of jeans or pants for them that do not have grass stains or holes in the knees.
  • There’s a love you feel for your son that’s too great and sometimes too scary to fully explain or even comprehend.

Being a mom of boys can quickly change you from being a girlie girl to one that throws on a ball cap, jeans and t-shirt to face the day.  The mode of adapting to boy stuff when you were once all about girly stuff can somewhat be a challenging aspect of motherhood.  Why, you ask?  Good question, read on.

Moms Must…Accept Messiness

Messy

The Boy enjoying his 1st birthday cake. He’ll be 18 this July.  Where does the time go?

Under every circumstance you must be prepared for a mess or messy boys.  They are not conscientious about tracking mud in the house when they run through it like the Tazmanian Devil, spraying water all over the bathroom during wash-up time or how they eat their birthday smash cake.

Boys will be boys and I cannot stress enough to moms or future moms of boys, not to be surprised by what you find in the aftermath of your son.  You could find boogers smeared on the walls (I just threw up a little in my mouth), urine on the floor around the toilet (were they really aiming?), or spilling their cereal on the floor like pigs at feeding time while you were trying to ready yourself for work.  Regardless of how much training boys receive, they still find their own way of doing somethings.

…Rethink Safety

SafetyChildren Boys (I can only draw on my experience from raising boys.)  Ahem…boys have their own level of safety, and it is called NONE!  They are afraid of “nuthzink” (said with a Colonel Klink accent.)

Boys hop on stuff, climb stuff, jump over stuff and may break stuff…their stuff, like a bone or two.  Since the time of this picture, the little guy who is jumping over the chair ended up breaking one of his ankles three times.  Once by dropping off of the monkey bars while playing at daycare, once when skipping up and down the driveway when he should have been helping his mom (me) carry groceries into the house and lastly when he was in an automobile accident that almost took his life.

So moms, no matter how much you safety proof the house or prepare your children for the future, accidents will happen, so you’ll need to learn quickly how to deal with blood, scrapes, broken bones, and broken hearts.

…Enjoy Cleanliness When You Can

BathTimeBath time was always a time of play for my boys because I knew if I made bath time fun, they’d want to take their baths…it worked thank goodness because they sure required a lot of them growing up.  Be prepared for a good soaking when the splashing starts and have a plentiful stock of body wash because boys like bubbles just as much as little girls.

…Think Farts Are Funny

By the grace of God I was born with toilet humor (I also had two older brothers who helped cultivate my acceptance of such.)  My brothers conditioned me to think farts and farting were funny…thank goodness I thought they were.  Having this mindset will make life much easier and happier for everyone involved; but we must remember there is a time and place for everything, right?  Yeah, right!!!

…Understand Boys Can Cause Drama

Didn't get his way.

Didn’t get his way.

Oh no, don’t be surprised when your little man pitches a fit when he doesn’t get his way.  They can cause just as much drama as little girls, but we must remember NOT to laugh when they are squealing at the top of their lungs and we’re thinking “he’d sure give a girl a run for her money with that octave.”

Oh yeah, boys will stop what they’re doing and throw things or walk across the room to pick up a toy so they can throw it just to demonstrate they can pitch a good dramatic hissy-fit.  Remember moms, this too shall pass (said giggling.)

…Know Their Little Boy Would Rather Be Naked

Mom’s have to be okay with their little boy running around the house in the nude because if they had their way, they would be naked more often than clothed.  Be prepared for your son to come into a room buck naked, letting it all hang out, putting it in the breeze because it will inevitably happen and probably at a time when you are entertaining guests.  Just something for you to think about.

…Remember They Grow Up In A Blink of An Eye

Yes, boys will be boys, but eventually they will grow up, graduate high school, marry their high school sweetheart, and move away.  Mom’s cherish your sons, love them, hug them, tell them bedtime stories, nurture them, and tell them you love them to the moon and back as often as you can.

GrowUp

Dave & Stacey

 

…Remember Children Are Our Gift from God

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Teach Your Boy’s Some General Guidelines/Rules

  1. Teach them to put the toilet seat down, not just the actual seat but the lid also and to not let it slam. (Speaking of slamming, you might also want to teach them to “hold” the seat up whilst pee-peeing so the seat doesn’t slam down on their tallywhacker they had resting on the toilet bowl.)
  2. Teach them to adjust, scratch, or pick at their privates in private.
  3. Teach them that it is okay to cry.  Not to pitch a hissy-fit because they didn’t get their way, but to express their genuine hurt through tears.
  4. Teach them that relationships are important and that it is okay to talk about how they are feeling or what upset them. Your future daughters-in-love will thank you and because of your willingness to teach them this behavior, they are likely to have a strong, long, and happy marriage.
  5. Teach him how to clean the house and prepare age appropriate meals/dishes.  He will thank you someday, because we all know there is nothing better than a man who can cook and doesn’t mind doing housework.
  6. Teach your sons to be obedient to God, polite and respectful of others and their property.
  7. Teach them to have a sense of clean humor, laughter truly is the best medicine.
  8. Let him express himself how he wants.  It’s his life, he’s like no other.  If he wants to play tea, have a miniature kitchen set or wear a tutu, let him.  It will either be a passing phase or he will never struggle with his identity.  (Moms, most times they grow out of it.  All three of my boys had tea sets and toy kitchens.)

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Filed under Children, Family, Grand-Children, Knowledge, Life, Life's-Adventures, Teenagers, The Boy